#speculativefiction

Now You Are in Trouble!: or Where did all the toilet paper go?

Now You Are in Trouble!: or Where did all the toilet paper go? BLURB: Don’t panic. Fifteen funny stories to get you through the pandemic. Because laughter is infectious.

The Authors

Stories by James Husum, Bill Bush, Nic Steven, Elizabeth McCleary, Gregg I. Veg, Sarah Neuen, Sabrina Rosen, Vanessa Wells, Juneta Key, Jemma Weir, VS Stark, and Katharina Gerlach

A Few Words from Juneta Key

I don’t know about everybody else, but what is funny—it ain’t so funny–is WHERE did all the toilet paper GO? Seriously, we are always looking for toilet paper and the prices are jacked up or what looks like a good deal is crap from China.

You hunt for weeks to find deals or you get up with the birds, wait in line at the stores, and stand six feet apart at all times. Follow the tape on the floor.

AND DON’T FORGET TO WEAR YOUR MASK or you won’t get in. And even then, you wait, AND STILL, you might not get TP as the person in front of you snags the last package. Geesh! Now You Are in Trouble or Where did all the toilet paper go? Yup, that is very apropos.

BUT we’re okay–have a little for a few more weeks. We are all gaining weight with all the home cooking because it is so much better than fast food. And let’s face it, what else is there to do?

Oh, I don’t know, go for a walk, read, watch tv, attend zoom get-togethers, go for a walk again, do video exercises, or use the Seven App on your mobile to exercise every ten minutes–never get bored. Yes, it is a thing Seven App.

No, no, my fave: EAT CHOCOLATE! It’s good for you, yap, that is my story I am sticking to it. Cliche I know, but so true.

The Seven App is a lot healthier choice—SO get in shape during COVID; I have seen that slogan, but am I? Ah… Nope, lol.

I did get my fast food hit recently. I had Taco Bell delivered through Grubhub. I had my groceries delivered through Instacart from Publix. I was already doing that as I am mostly homebound due to mobility issues.

My social life has really picked up during COVID with all the Zoom get-togethers. That is one thing I do like about the shut-in Zoom parties. And here you thought it was all doom and gloom or just laugh your way through it.

Stay Safe. Act Responsibility. And for Gawd sakes, leave some toilet paper on the shelves for other people, will ya—quit hogging it all.