myth

Photo: Created by Vanessa Wells

Bone Killer by Juneta Key

Turns out not even immortals are immune to the COVID-19 virus.

Turns out not even immortals are immune to the COVID-19 virus.

They do not die per se… they fade.

Zeus was tired of tripping over all the ghost-like gods hanging around. They were not precisely dead, just transparent, so Hades refused to take them. He did not want to risk exposure. He had sealed himself and Persephone in his lair and warded it against everyone else. They were officially in quarantine in the underworld. No COVID-19 dead or living allowed.

Zeus might have enjoyed this pandemic since Mount Olympus was empty except for the faded gods. Turns out the King of the Gods was immune, but others were not, including Hera. She was not a happy camper. In the pre-fade, they could not interact with the corporal world or eat ambrosia. A serious or mortal injury could endanger their immortality.

Except Hera had figured out a way to manipulate energy to affect the corporal world. Granted it was not magic or god powers, but if done right it could scare the Kronos out of anyone.

Since COVID-19 and the lockdown, human females were hornier than usual. Hera had become a real bone killer with her spook antics. Every time he got lucky, she ghosted in startling him so bad he singed the bedsheets with lightning sparks.

He could not even find peace in the bath. She haunted him even in the Laconia, the steam bath, housed in a circular room with a conical domed roof outside the communal areas.

He increased the fires under the floor thinking he would sweat her out, but in pre-fade, she did not sweat. He only succeeded in causing his chambermaids who had survived COVID to flee and had to bathe himself.

Zeus consulted with healer’s human, gods, and goddess to heal Hera. It was the only way he would get his life back. None succeeded. He decided to call for the son of Apollo, his grandson Asclepius, the god healer with the ability to raise the dead, except Zeus had killed him. In death, he granted him the honor to rest among the stars.

So, Zeus gathers the constellation Ophiuchus from the night sky, shaping the stars into a human form, pulling lightning from the heavens to spark life. Something Zeus could not do for those touched or faded by COVID-19, even gods had their limits.

Asclepius eyes opened.

Zeus called forth the rod of Asclepius and presented it to his grandson. He pointed at Hera. “Heal her!”

The newly resurrected god of medicine got slowly to his feet taking in his surroundings. His eyes finally returned to his grandfather. “Why would I do that?”

“I returned your life.”

“You killed me.”

“That was eons ago. Hera, the harpy, is ruining my life. I just want my life back to normal.”

“Live with-it, grandad!” Asclepius scoffed. “It will never be the same. The students of Asclepius have finally delivered my mother’s revenge.”

“Your mother Coronis rests in the constellation Corvus.”

“I know. Very à propos, don’t you think? That the Apocalypse is ushered in by the Coronavirus.”