Storytime Blog Hop

My Darling Shaya,

I can’t imagine what you must be feeling. If you found this letter then I know you are searching for pieces of me. It would be impossible for me to imagine a world without you in it.

This was not the plan, but know that I love you, always.

Do you remember the first time we met?

You were wearing those short shorts squatting by your red bug. Your red hair pulled into a wild looking clip on top of your head.

I felt punched in the gut. Mesmerized.

You wouldn’t let me help you. You thought I was a thug on a motorcycle. You even made a snarky comment about my wife-beater t-shirt.

So I watched waiting for you to ask for help. You didn’t. The myriads of expression that filtered across your face told their own story.

Your awareness of me. Your stubbornness, frustration through determination, but you got that tire changed. It took you twice as long as it would have taken me. Broke several nails and skinned up your hands. You were so proud of yourself lit from within. Your grin stole my breath.

You were feeling so brave.  We were so young.  You asked me to meet you for a coke, as a thank you for waiting, just in case you needed help.

We met at mom and pop’s diner. You, walking in with the local hoodlum by your side, turned a few heads.   You didn’t even blink despite the frowns.  

Then you surprised me, daring me to go out with you.   

It was probably a bad idea.  You were a senior in school.  I had already graduated and worked fulltime at the mechanic shop.  Bad idea.  I knew it, but I couldn’t resist.  We both felt the connection.

I was used to trouble, but were you?  I was not the boy next door.   

You surprised me again by insisting I meet your parents.  It was a condition.  I came close to calling it off.  Not sure I wanted the headache, but I was already hooked. 

I thought your parents would forbid you to see me.  Your dad invited me inside I figured to warn me off or threaten me. Shock.  No lectures, no threats or warnings.   

We talked in the den about motorcycles, cars, racing and my job at the mechanic shop, while your mom went upstairs to tell you I was waiting for you.  

That was a defining moment for me.   I realized it was not that your parents trusted me, but they trusted you. They respected you and your choices.

I never had much family, but I recognized the rarity of yours.  I wanted that.

We’ve had our rough moments but through it all, you gave me that.  Family.

You taught me about real love and what that looks like in the daily living of it.

My life was better because of you. I was better.  Loving you, our family…  What a grand life we’ve had.    

Thank you for that beautiful girl.  I have no regrets. 

There is so much life in you still.  I don’t want you to be alone.  Live large, my love.  Stay strong.  Find joy.  Find love again and live for both of us.  I dare you.  That is what I want for you.  It’s okay to be happy.  

I love you, always, Jack.